Forgiveness Isn’t Optional—It’s Foundational - Reflections on Matthew 6:12
The following is a modified version (with a little help from ChatGPT) of a Bible study on Matthew 6:12 that I led during one of our midweek church gatherings. I felt compelled to share it here, as I believe there's so much we can all learn about forgiveness.
"And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." (Matthew 6:12, NIV)
Let’s talk about something that stirs up all kinds of emotions—forgiveness.
Maybe just reading that word brings a sense of relief, reminding you of a time someone let you off the hook when you didn’t deserve it. Or maybe it causes a tight knot in your stomach, because there’s someone in your life you know you still haven’t forgiven—and maybe you’re not sure if you even want to.
Either way, forgiveness is at the very heart of the Christian life. It’s something we both need and are called to give. In Matthew 6:12, right in the middle of the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus draws a direct connection between how we receive forgiveness from God and how we extend it to others.
Let’s unpack that a bit.
What Does Jesus Mean by “Debts” and “Debtors”?
The word “debts” in this verse isn’t just talking about money. In the original Greek (opheilēmata), it refers to something owed—yes, financially—but also morally and spiritually. In other words: sin.
When Jesus says, “forgive us our debts,” He’s talking about our sins—our failures to live according to God’s will. “Debtors,” then, are those who’ve sinned against us.
That simple sentence—“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors”—carries two weighty truths:
1. We Are in Need of God’s Forgiveness
Let’s not gloss over this. We all fall short.
Romans 3:23 puts it plainly:
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."
That means you, me, and everyone we know. We are, by nature, pulled away from God’s design—choosing pride over humility, self over service, and sin over obedience.
Sin is a debt we could never repay on our own. It’s a burden we carry until we bring it to the only One who can forgive it. That’s why 1 John 1:9 is such a balm:
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."
God wants to forgive you. He’s not holding a grudge. He’s waiting with open arms.
2. We Also Have a Responsibility to Forgive Others
Now here’s where it gets a little more uncomfortable.
Just as we need forgiveness, we are called to give it—even when it feels undeserved.
Jesus was clear about this in Matthew 18, when Peter asked how many times he should forgive someone. Jesus answered:
"Seventy-seven times."
(Not literally. It means: keep forgiving.)
Ephesians 4:32 echoes that call:
"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."
This isn’t a feel-good suggestion—it’s a command. Jesus wasn’t just giving us a spiritual to-do list; He was showing us how to live in the freedom we’ve been given.
But here’s the warning:
Jesus continues in Matthew 6:14–15, saying that if we don’t forgive others, our Father won’t forgive us.
That’s serious.
It’s not about earning God’s grace—because we never could—but it is about aligning our hearts with His. If we withhold forgiveness from others, we’re rejecting the very mercy we depend on ourselves.
When Forgiveness Feels Impossible
Let’s get real: forgiving people who’ve hurt us isn’t easy.
Maybe someone deeply betrayed your trust. Maybe they said something that changed the course of your life. Forgiveness in those moments? It feels impossible.
But here’s the question: Who are we to withhold forgiveness, when God has forgiven us everything?
In Matthew 18, Jesus tells the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant—a man forgiven of a massive debt who then refuses to forgive someone else’s much smaller debt. The king in the story ends up revoking his forgiveness. Why? Because the servant didn’t extend the same grace he had received.
Unforgiveness hardens our hearts. It ruins relationships. It builds walls between us and God. And over time, it poisons our soul.
Jesus Showed Us the Way
One of the most powerful examples of forgiveness is found in Jesus’ final moments.
As He hung on the cross—mocked, beaten, humiliated—what did He say?
"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34)
Think about that. Jesus, fully God, had every right to call down judgment. But He chose compassion.
And that forgiveness had an impact. Just a few verses later, a Roman centurion witnessing it all exclaims: "Surely this was a righteous man." (Luke 23:47)
Forgiveness, even in suffering, reveals something holy. Something transformative.
What About You?
So let’s bring this home.
Who in your life have you struggled to forgive?
A coworker? A parent? A friend? A fellow Christian?
Maybe it’s time to take that first step. Not because they deserve it. But because you have been forgiven—and because clinging to unforgiveness only holds you captive.
The good news? You don’t have to do it in your own strength. The Holy Spirit is ready to help you let go, to soften your heart, and to bring healing where there’s been pain.
So as you head into this week, ask yourself:
- Have I truly received God’s forgiveness?
- Is there anyone I’m still holding in unforgiveness?
- What would it look like to release that burden today?
Let’s follow the example of Christ. Let’s be people who forgive—not just with our words, but with our hearts.
And let’s never forget: Forgiveness isn’t optional. It’s foundational.
